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Learning to Feel


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#1 Dexel Hydagara

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Posted 28 May 2012 - 08:15 PM

Got a psychologist appointment tomorrow, but may as well keep this fresh on my mind. Feel free to let this just go unreplied. I don't know why the hell I'm even bothering y'all with more of my problems. I hate doing it.

-x-

I've just been feeling dismal lately again, despite the meds. I think I've just come to a bit of a realization: it's not really because I'm sad about not being able to socialize with others, though it certainly helps. I could have that and still have problems, though.

Truth is, life is just one big monotony to me. It's how I get my sense of time screwed up, how I can not feel like doing things even if I felt like there is something I should do. The normal ebb and flow of things here pretty much doesn't allow me to have much time for self-reflection, and in most cases, a chance to really notice how I feel about most things or what piques my interest.

Everything's just so mindless and mechanic these days except for the bad shit that always seems to happen lately. There's nothing that really stirs much excitement or interest lately that's put in a positive light. Perhaps I'm just so melancholy as an assurance I can even feel in the first place. Naturally, that just depresses me more, along with how I just...don't have a feel for a specific role I should have, what I should do with the rest of my life. In all honesty, I'm even starting to doubt how I'll get along with Candice, but I could never tell her that. It's ironically one of the last things I got to look forward to.

TL;DR? Life's just like one big chore, and lately, it feels more like I'm existing just for the sake of existance without really being able to enjoy much along the way. For some reason or another, the appeal of everything's wearing off, and more than once I have to ask myself why the hell I'm still around.

I still feel, it's just very...numbed.

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#2 Blade

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Posted 28 May 2012 - 08:20 PM

The only way to fix all of that is to pick yourself up and go do something active. I've been there, in fact every human in this world has gone through what you are. The fact is you need to feel good about yourself and once you feel comfortable in your skin you will feel the joy and happiness that you always looked for. If you tell yourself you are not worthy to Candice or others then you will present yourself as an unworthy being.

I had a similar problem and what happened to me was that I had a cousin who loved me, he took me by the hand and took me to a park where we played basketball...eventually I met a lot of good people and I play everyday now.

You need to get out and do something instead of just moping around like a little sissy.


#3 Epic

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Posted 29 May 2012 - 06:12 AM

Dex, take it from a guy who knows, moping around is going to do nothing but make people think less of you. The best you'll get is pity and that's no prize at all.

I wish you luck, of course.

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“Take the risk of thinking for yourself. Much more happiness, truth, beauty, and wisdom will come to you that way. I promise."

- Christopher Hitchens


#4 Epic

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Posted 29 May 2012 - 06:12 AM

Dex, take it from a guy who knows, moping around is going to do nothing but make people think less of you. The best you'll get is pity and that's no prize at all.

I wish you luck, of course.

hitchens-1949-2011-by-Gasper-Tringale.jp

 

“Take the risk of thinking for yourself. Much more happiness, truth, beauty, and wisdom will come to you that way. I promise."

- Christopher Hitchens